Hello, my friends. You’ve been great to me. I’ve enjoyed our time together, and so i must leave now.
I need to go whilst things are still rosy and good. I can be brave to go someplace new because i know i’m coming from someplace good.
And maybe, deep down, i’m afraid that if i stick around for too long, i’ll get used to you. That the magic will dissipate, and there won’t be anymore sparks. Maybe i’m overthinking, but you lot are magic to me, and i’d like it to always remain that way.
So… i’ll go but not say goodbye. Because i’ll come back, as a slightly different person.
And it’ll be nice to see everyone again, but it’ll be a little sad because i can only watch from outside and not be a part of the show.
Then as the days and weeks past, we might slowly drift apart, as it usually happens. Till one day we don’t see each other anymore, and then a year later i’d look back and my heart will well up with sadness. Longing for the good old days, missing your company and the good times we had.
Do you know what?
If i weren’t afraid, i wouldn’t leave. Yes, that’s it.
It’s all fear. I’m afraid our friendship will lose its sheen. I’m afraid we’d have drama and things might get ugly.
And most of all, i’m afraid that i won’t have the courage and discipline to push myself to be something more. Because God knows i have hopes and dreams, and a million plans but not the drive.
Is this how it normally is? Because i was not expecting to dive this deep.
So i’ll just end here and say that i love all of you, and i miss you already. You, and all my kurasumetsu, and all my friends from across the years.
I love you all SO MUCH, with all my heart. Thank you for your friendship.
We’ll probably see each other around someday… it’s a small world.